Friday, November 03, 2006

Moral Dilemma

**Moral dilemma shall be a ongoing series in which good (karma) and evil (usually in the form of money in my pocket) do battle in my brain. Evil is batting a thousand so far.**

I was clearing at the south door at Wynn. My single passenger was drunk and after I told him the fare amount he begin fingering through his loaf of money. As he was doing that I watched a hundred fall out of the disorganized pile of cash and land on the seat 6 inches right next to him. He didn't see it, I had the eagle eye and watched it fall before the event even occured. He paid me for the ride and as he was exiting I reached back, grabbed the bill and held it up. I said as he's shutting the door:

Hey Buddy!

He didn't hear me. I rolled the back window down and gave it a good holla as he was now 15ft or so away.



I suppose I could have yelled a little louder. Perhaps I could have starting honking the horn or better yet parked it and ran after the guy.

Fuck that.



Anonymous said...

God is watching, put it in the tray at church, it's all His anyway. or do something good with it, Cancer,or Heart fund. Don't keep it it's not yours

MrFunkMD said...

Hi Mom. Your name says anonymous but I know it's you.

You know I'm not a big church go'er so I've decided I'm going to give it to a stripper so she can take it to church for us.

Love, your son

Anonymous said...

Good job on deciding to use it on strippers. 100 will get you a fun time i would imagine.

Anonymous said...

Fare, Andy. It's spelled fare.

MrFunkMD said...

Crap. The grammar police found me here too.

Anonymous said...

Don't worry, there is no god.


Anonymous said...

so how were the strippers ?

Hawaiianmark said...

Keep it, and the stories coming!


joellama said...

so what was the moral dilemma?

Anonymous said...

ehh, i say keep it. you deserve it.

MrFunkMD said...

Joe- when that hundo falling on the seat goes unnoticed by your patron your forced to make the decision as to whether you should tell the guy or not.

It's obvious that if you say nothing it's yours. Therein lies the dilemma of the moral variety.

joellama said...

this is the very reason why i keep low cash on hand when im drunk. that and because all i have is low cash. i probable wouldve done the same thing in this situation though.

Anonymous said...

By the way its the spelling police, not this case.

Murphcon said...

Should have honked louder or followed the guy. This crap doesn't happen often enough to make it worth it. I drove cab in the late 80's and had a few of these opportunities and struggled a bit with them. In the end I decided that I could be happy enough taking home $28k per year the straight way, rather than a couple hundred more as a thief. The pay was good enough and I needed to live with myself.

I loaded a nice young Canadian couple at Vegas World (Stratosphere now) and took them to the Sands for the Gallagher show. The fare was 5.30 and they left a 1.70 tip which was good. I ended up waiting at the Dunes when I looked back and saw two twenties on the back seat. Great score, but then I started thinking these were good people and I knew where they were. I drove back to the Sands, parked the cab and went to the showroom and explained it to the Maitre de. He let me into the showroom and I scanned the whole room for the cute blonde with the black and white cow pattern dress. I couldn't see them anywhere, but before I left I knew that I hadn't looked over my left shoulder at the back wall. I didn't want to look because I figured I had tried hard enough already but I forced myself to look and there she was. I asked the guy if he lost anything and he said "yeah, I lost 50 bucks".

"Well I found 40 of it." I walked off with a ten dollar tip and 29 years later, believe me, it's better that way.

I had another guy from Caeser's to DI. He looked like a guy who owned a night club somewhere and wasn't hurting for cash. He paid the bill and walked away but when I closed his door I saw a $100 Caesar's chip on the bench where he was sitting. I figured the guy wouldn't miss it, but by that time I knew the drill. I followed the guy through the door and gave it back and ended up with an extra $5. I felt like a douche bag for doing it but I don't regret it. After 30,000 rides, I've got enough regrets.

Those 2 rides were both good tippers, but what do you do with a stiff who leaves their wallet or purse in the cab? I had two middle aged couples with bags from McCarran to the Flamingo for $7.50 and got $8. A bit lame but better than a dime. I was a mile north when the dispatcher started looking for the cab that had that ride because the guy lost his wallet. I looked back, found the wallet and told her I had it. She says "turn your meter on and bring it back". Due to the lame tip I circled the Fashion Show mall once or twice for fun. I dinged him for an extra dollar or two, but I wasn't going to pocket his whole bankroll.

Another time I picked up two Afro American couples from the Charter terminal (aka 39) to the IP. Plenty of bags and a $7.90 fare. I got the $8 I was expecting and drove off. Soon after, the dispatcher was looking for a cab with a lost purse who loaded from 41 (main terminal) to IP. I should have figured it out because half the charter terminal people didn't know the difference. I had 3 loads while she was calling. Finally as I was leaving Ceasar's, I looked back and found the purse wedged between the bench and the sidewall of the mini van. I radioed "I've got the purse". Dispatcher says turn the meter on and bring it back. I was only a hundred yards from the IP and the light was green but I turned it on and pulled in before it clicked past 1.70. I told her to check it because I had a few rides since dropping her off. Her wad of bills was intact and she gave me $20 for the $1.70 fare. I figured she had 30 minutes to nag her husband about the dime tip before I returned it.

Sometimes a little good karma comes back at you. In 2014 I tipped a cabbie $7 for a ride to the airport. I left my damn wallet in his cab with zero cash but all my ID and credit cards. My trip would have been cancelled but that guy brought it back. Maybe I was lucky there wasn't any cash in it but it felt like payback for doing the same for others.