Sunday, April 23, 2006

One of my supervisors told me a good one.

Some time ago when my cab company had far less cabs to account for they had a problem with one that they couldn't find. They knew that the cab had been taken out for the night shift and knew which driver was driving it. For some reason mgmt. needed to talk to the guy, but he wasn't answering the radio or his cell phone. An APB of sorts was put out over the radio to ask all the other drivers to keep an eye out for him. Hours passed and nobody had spotted the guy, so the owner of the company finally instructed a couple of the supervisors to stop by the guys house perchance to find him and or the cab.

Sure enough when they get to the guys house the cab is parked in the driveway. They knocked on the door and nobody answered. One of them tried the door and it was unlocked so they let themselves in. As they walked in they heard the driver yelling from the bedroom in the back. They walk through the house and into the bedroom to find the driver butt-naked handcuffed to the bed. Arms handcuffed to the headboard of the bed and legs handcuffed to the footboard of the bed. Like a giant X.

The driver informed the sups that he had given a hooker a ride who didn't have money for the fair. So they agreed to go back to his house to exchange sex for the meter amount. At which point the hooker convinced the driver to let her handcuff him to the bed. Being the smart guy that he was he allowed her to do it. Shortly thereafter she left the scene but certainly not before robbing him of his book money and rummadging through the house for other valuables.

My supervisors didn't find the guy until hours had passed.

that's fuckin did you guys get the handcuffs undone?

We didn't even try, we took the keys for the cab and left him there

I mean shit, everybody knows that if you're going to let the hooker handcuff you to the bed you always leave one hand free and an extra key in the bedside table. That's day 1 stuff.


Andy Kaufman said...


ANewLifeANewMe said...

Jesus...I think I peed a little reading that! My favourite :)